Neon Bright

Month

May 2011

A 3 months pregnant woman falls into a deep coma. 6 months later, she awakes and asks the doctor about her baby.
  • Doctor: You had twins, a boy and a girl, and they are both fine. Luckily, your brother named them for you.
  • Woman: Oh no, not my brother! He's an idiot! What did he name the girl?
  • Doctor: Denise.
  • Woman: Well it isn't so bad, and what did he call the boy?
  • Doctor: Denephew.
May 30, 2011128,129 notes
how to piss someone off → tumblr.com

blink9475:

pretty-in-pinkk:

wesaysummer:

THAT’S BRILLIANT

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epic troll!!!

May 30, 201116,925 notes
Calories burned during sex:

dingyfeathers:

  • Woman on top 25 calories
  • Doggy Style 40 calories
  • Per gasp 3 calories
  • Screaming 18 calories
  • Urgent begging 22 calories
  • Digging nails 11 calories
  • Shaking 20 calories
  • Licking 24 calories
  • Real Orgasm 27 calories
  • Fake Orgasm 160 calories
May 30, 201117,858 notes
May 30, 201114,550 notes
when you're playing hide and seek and can't find anywhere to hide so when you hear 'ready or not here i come' you're all like:

blink9475:

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HAHAHAHAHA!!!! lol!!

May 28, 201189,554 notes
May 28, 201116,476 notes
May 28, 201117,993 notes
I'll be in a car and see some grafitti,



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And I’ll think “How the fuck do they get up that high?”

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AND HOW DIDN’T ANYBODY SEE THEM DO IT ??

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May 27, 2011106,349 notes
When your friends make plans that involve money

yourfaceisaminordetail:

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GPOY GPOY GPOY

May 27, 2011112,631 notes
It's funny how you can control my mood so easily. You're sweet to me, I'm happy. You're a dick, I'm pissed off. You don't text me, I'm sad. I wish you didn't mean so much to me.
May 27, 2011610 notes
May 25, 201129,652 notes
May 25, 201115,182 notes
May 25, 201160,953 notes
May 25, 20112,277 notes
May 24, 201140,183 notes
Play
3:30
May 22, 201118,900 notes
May 22, 20116,444 notes
May 22, 201158,361 notes
May 22, 201123,061 notes
Reblog if you're secretly a 56 year old pedophile.

blink9475:

therock-kid:

oddfutureandfriends:

highdosageofdope:

Only reason why I’m on here

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HOLY SHITTTTTTTTTTTTTT!
ONe MILLION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

May 22, 2011999k+ notes
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